Just a Normal Tuesday

So get this, we just got back from the gym. That's right, the gym. And yes, I was there, I was one of the ones who got back from the gym just moments ago. THE GYM. Where I actually did stuff that made my muscles sore. And get this, today was my fourth day at the gym. I am making some serious progress, my friends. Though, before you think I'm bragging let me tell you this:

Workout Day 1 - Pilates, followed by chicken bacon pizza.
Workout Day 2 - Spin, followed by leftover chicken bacon pizza.
Workout Day 3 - Upper Body, followed by Chick-fil-A
Workout Day 4 - Treadmill and Pilates, followed by a frozen Chimichanga.

So yeah, I'd say I'm doing real good.

There is nothing healthy in our house and do you realize how tired working out makes you? I don't have energy left to go shopping. Mostly because going shopping means hours of convincing Jonah to get ready, get in the car, get out of the car, walk by me and not in the road, get in the shopping cart, stop screaming, convincing him he is my child*, don't grab stuff off the shelf, don't throw things out of the cart, don't press the buttons while I pay, get out of the cart, get into the car, get out of the car, go inside the house.

I feel like someone should've prepared me better but the terrible twos were a breeze compared to the utterly exhausting daily - nay, hourly - struggle that is the infuriating despicable never-ending threes.


*There was once a time when Jonah didn't want to come with Millie and me into the store, so I told him he needed to come because we were family, I was his mom and he was my child and we needed to do stuff together. Well, the rest of the shopping trip he kept screaming "I'm not your child!" and I was so relieved not to walk out of that place in handcuffs. 


So yesterday I read this article that had tips to deal with kids like Jonah. You know, ones that think they know more than you, that think they are above the rules, I believe the term they used is "Wise in their Own Eyes" which is sooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo true. I can't even stress how true that is in Jonah's case. At least once a day he says "How many times do I have to tell you not to get mad at me?" or if I ask him to do something and he refuses, I say "I said (insert thing)" and he won't bat an eye before saying "I said no."

Uuuurrrrrrgggghhhh!! What do I do?! I'm so at a loss. Because the thing we decided to try from that article was having him say "Yes Mom" after I ask him to do something. The author says that children are so innocent that they still consider their word as their bond, so getting them to say "yes mom" is kind of like having them make a verbal contract that they'll obey you. Figures, right?
So this morning:

"Jonah we're going to the Y, so you need to get dressed, please. Say 'Yes Mom'"
"No"
"Say Yes mom"
"I said no"
"Jonah, I want you to get dressed. Say yes mom"
"No mom"
"Say Yes mom"
"I said no mom"
Forcing him to make eye contact with me, I say "Jonah, we're going to the Y and you need to get dressed. SAY YES MOM."
"Yes mom"
"Good boy, now lets get dressed."
"I said no"

Cue my first beating into my own forehead to keep from beating into him. What is my child, the spawn of the devil? Because when Jesus said we should all become like little children I'm pretty sure they left out the part where he said "Except three year olds. Please don't be anything like three year olds. Seriously, you will not get into Heaven."

So anyway, yes mom apparently doesn't work. Even though I'll probably keep up with it for the rest of the week for consistency's sake - and if it doesn't seem to be working by then I'll start googling new tips.

I really hope that this is just three year olds in general, and it's not something only I'm either doing or not doing that is psychologically ruining him. I just need to keep telling myself 9 more months, 9 more months...
But then someone will smile evilly and tell me threes are easy compared to fours... and so on and so forth until they move out of the house and then I supposed I'll be saying "I should've enjoyed them while they're young" but GOSH that's so hard to think about right now! Please tell me I'm not the only one!

Anyway, end of Jonah rant. Shall I give a Millie update? Oh, she's great. She's peaches and cream. She's sweet potato pie. She's smiling all the time and even sleeping much better! She's the cutest little girl who can't talk back yet and loves to be cuddled and is working on her first tooth. She's helping me keep my sanity.