This is NOT a Pregnancy Post

But don't you wish it were? 

I've given it a lot of thought, and I've decided its best if I just be frank with you all from this point on.


We're not expecting.
But when we are, we'll call you and tell you.


However, it has been on my mind quite frequently as of late--as Kade and I approach our one-year-anniversary (which is generally the conception point for most Utahns); also as many friends and acquaintances have just given birth or announced their new pregnancy.

It's strange, I tell ya.

The more I think about it the more I consider the possibility of our own future children (well, probability anyway), and then I think wow, are we old enough for that?


are we ready for that?


will we be able to provide for it?


will the stress just eat at our marriage?


But then I always have to remind myself to quit sweating it so much. I have to remind myself of all the other times in my life where I've been nervous about something and just left it up to the Lord to take care of it, and I have to remind myself that He always does.


Seriously. This is true doctrine.

I'm sure I got this ideology from my mother, who I most often associate with memories of learning to think positively and trust that things will work out... if you're doing what you should.


Applicable (recent) story: One day a friend announced that he and his wife were expecting their first baby. I quickly ran through the facts in my head and determined (in a most regretfully ignorant way) that there was no way he and his wife could have planned their pregnancy. However, when I asked, he said it was absolutely intentional.

But how???
I asked, nearly pleading.

He said his wife felt like it was the right time, and that he knew that Heavenly Father would take care of things for them. He smiled as he shrugged his shoulders.
He saw that I was stumped, and he began to share all the little things that the Lord had already taken care of for them since they found out-- a cheaper, two-bedroom apartment suddenly became available for them, his wife was able to jump on her mother's pretty good health insurance--they will have to take her regardless of pre-existing conditions, and I'm sure numberless other blessings!

This all made so much sense to me.

and...

I think we're doing what we should.
Yeah,
we're doing what we should...

so why am I so nervous?


and when I think that, I think of what my cousin once said to me,

"You're never ready. You just have to do it and everything will work out."

I know God will take care of us. We're not in it alone. We didn't come to earth to experience (scary) new things and go through trials all by ourselves...

if anything, this life is for us to learn not only how to do hard things,
but who to rely on while we do them.

So, I guess I can take comfort in the fact that I've got a loving Heavenly Father, tons of super supportive family members, and an incredible, reliable, helpful, happy, handsome husband.

Plus, who wouldn't want one of these little guys running around your living room?

(I'm kinda excited to have my own little mini kade)